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Daisybutter - UK Style and Fashion Blog: thoughts on introversion
in·tro·vert (n.) - a person characterized by concern primarily with his or her own thoughts and feelings (opposed to extrovert).
Since leaving University (and my beautiful cat who I shared with the best friend) more than 14 months ago, my introversion has come on leaps and bounds.

You see, real life doesn't often leave opportunity for being an introvert. You're expected to get on with things, be a team-player at work (and obviously, too), there'll be errands to run, people to see and there's not really much scope for 'I quite want to be on my own'.

I'm very lucky to be self-employed. From the moment I studied freelancing as a module for my degree, I knew that being self-employed would be 'me'. I'm my own boss, I approach and am approached by clients and have much more freedom that most. But with that comes a need for networking, something that I was once terrible at yet also something that blogging has opened my eyes to. The blogging community makes it so easy to feel welcomed and appreciated without feeling like you have to try too hard in conversation. Once we've had our evenings on Twitter, airing all and chatting about the oddest topics, meeting up with a near-stranger for an event seems pretty normal!

Introversion in my experience leaves you feeling torn between two places. On one hand, having short bursts of time with others and then some time to myself is perfect for recharging, yet on the other, I can't help but constantly worry (when I'm usually pretty darn laidback) that I'm being left behind in the competitive industry that I've valiantly begun to try and conquer.

What are your thoughts, and experience, on being an introvert? Any tips for breaking out of your shell for real-real life? 

20 comments

  1. An interesting read, doll! I'm almost as extroverted as they come so I found this eye-opening. I'm not sure if being really chatty/laughy/loud is my way of coping with awkward situations (which, because I'm a pretty awkward gal, seem to follow me around like a lost puppy) or if it's because I really enjoy other people's company. Then again, I'm hugely self-sufficient so love being alone. Maybe I'm a bit of both?!

    x Michelle | thefeatherden.net

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    1. Thank you Michelle! Ah it's always interesting to read about the other side. I'm just more than happy to tick over on the side really, nice and awkward! I'd like to think I'm fairly self-sufficient, but actually that isn't the case at all - another interesting point! x

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  2. I am definitely an introvert as well. I have definitely been forced to adapt for uni, but I still find that I would rather take some time out at lunch and eat alone and not have to try really hard to interact with other people.

    The blogging world is good as you can be as involved as you want, and being able to think out a response before conveying it definitely helps! My friend once told me that all the bloggers she knew were introvert types, haha.

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    1. I think Uni is a prime example of adapting introversion. I struggled at Uni because you almost have to socialise to cope and not be so alone, but at the same time, it tires you and makes you anxious! Oh definitely, I think blogging brings all us introverts together. x

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  3. Oh, I can definitely relate to this. Too much social time leaves me totally drained! I'm not much of a 'small-talker' either, so people probably find me overly shy and that can be hard. I've also been told that I'm very private and it's hard to get to know me because I don't really talk about myself. The blogging community has always been super welcoming though, and I never feel under pressure to present myself in any particular way so that's good. xxx

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    1. Ah definitely. Small talk is so awkward! I'm quite shy as it is, so the two combined is terrible. I'm also a very private person, as much as I share online, so that's definitely something I can relate to. x

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  4. I really admire you for your freelancing Michelle. It's something i'm not sure i'll be all that good at to be honest but you seem to come on leaps and bounds. I feel you on wanting 'alone' time. I love being social but every so often I need to be on my own. I blame only child but honestly my perfect night in would just be me plodding along in my room. I find 3 or 4 days on the trot seeing people and doing things is enough for me. But blogging has opened so many doors for me so I strive to do everything that i'm offered. Not even sure if any of this is making any sense or indeed answered your question!
    Sophie
    x

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    1. D'aw Sophie! I really enjoy it, I think being my own boss and working out how things on the wider scale work is good for me at the moment. My perfect night is just sitting there with a series of something to watch, a splattering of games and my music! I prefer written words to talking in real life, which comes as no surprise! x

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  5. I really enjoyed reading this, it just shows how different people can succeed in a difficult industry. I also find it hard to break out of my shell. I am shy at first but when people get to know me they soon realise I am completely different! Uni has helped because you are mixed with people from all walks of life/ different ages etc. I am preparing myself to move to London when I finish Uni and that will be my biggest challenge yet!
    You have done brilliantly and I really look up to what you have achieved with your blog and career :) Keep going!

    Abi xx

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    1. Thank you Abi! I just thought I'd touch on it because it's something that every teacher I had up to Uni mentioned to me. I think that this industry is way more accessible than people think. Aw moving to London will be amazing for you. Not sure if I could do the same, I'm so much of a small town girl! Thank you so much for your lovely comment sweet! x

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  6. I am definitely high on the introvert scale! My uni days has helped me become a bit better talking to people but I still would rather be at home most days aha. I like meeting new people one on one so that makes it easier but I know that I need to start looking at jobs soon so I need to start talking and being more of a team player! I think it's amazing you've managed to start your own little business too! xxx

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    1. Uni definitely helped me as well, it was odd being out of my comfort zone and being forced to open up and socialise with people! I think I've found a good balance that I'm happy with now. Aw thanks lovely! (:

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  7. I´m the same, and I dream of being self-employed, lucky you! I read the ebook "The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World" and it really helped me come to terms with being an Introvert

    ordainingserendipitiy

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    1. It wasn't something I'd really considered until I studied a little about it at Uni, and then I quickly realised that it would be the dream! Ooh I'll definitely have to have a read of that. The topic really interests me! x

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  8. How funny, it seems like most bloggers lean towards introversion! I'm also one, but get by since my close friends are like me and give me space. I'll have to admit though, it's a bit hard in uni where everyone is quite outgoing and I feel like there's something wrong with me. I'm also doing a studying a field that requires a lot of social interaction, so that doesn't help!

    Unfortunately I couldn't give any good advice, but I've been trying not to be tempted to spend too much time alone over thinking things. I feel like that drives me crazy, so leaving the house or focusing on productive goals would be a good thing for me. Hopefully I come across some more tips to share, though!

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    1. It's interesting, isn't it?! I think most introverts simply prefer the written word to the spoken word. My friends kinda accept that I'm a little more off the beat and independent, but I'm not sure if they really get the whole 'being alone is good' thing. They always joke about it as 'Mish is a hermit' which is also true! Focusing on productivity sounds good to me, thanks for your comment Mani! x

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  9. Freelancing sounds perfect for you! I am HUGELY shy but I do like the buzz of the office, I would be lost without it!

    Maria xxx

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    1. I'm really enjoying it! Finally settled into the swing of things now and I'm enjoying being my own boss and learning more about the industry as I progess! x

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  10. I think a lot of bloggers start blogs because they're shy or introverted and want to share their opinions from the comfort of their own homes. I would put myself in the same category as you but I think, to borrow from Nike, sometimes you need to just do it - go to an event solo, getting chatting to someone new or step out of your comfort zone in one way or another. I try to do this at every opportunity and so far it's worked out well! x

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  11. I think this is one of those tough topics because the answers aren't always easy to hear. In business situations, I'm a pretty outgoing person, I have to be. I've been doing business networking meetings since I was 17, and my job requires that I sound like I know what I'm talking about. But, I also get introversion too. My final year of uni made it difficult for me to even say hello to people, let alone hold a conversation. The sad truth is, that whatever I was going through, being introverted made me come across as rude, sullen and self involved. I think enjoying your own time and space is an important thing to do, but in situations that require it, we all have to have and utilise a public face, a mask if you will, because other wise, you blow your chances with people who don't get that actually you just quite fancy hiding from the world, and why should they, since their not mind readers. I guess we all just have to try and see it from the opposed perspective.

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